Do you feel you are not confident at times?
I’m with you!
I can understand how you feel. At one point in time, I was not being confident in what I was going to say or do - both in my personal and work life several years back. I can’t tell why I didn’t have confidence, but I can say for sure that it has been there for decades.
I was stammering at school while reading the textbook. Many people thought I was having a hard time reading things. My lips used to lock when I was about to answer someone, and I felt bad later.
Because I was stammering, I lost more confidence. I started avoiding social gatherings at one point in my life. No one in my family or friends knew about this challenge I was facing in my childhood.
I can’t blame anyone for this. This could be due to my upbringing, some trauma that I can’t recall a defect in my mental mechanics. Whatever it was, I was not happy, and I felt it was suffering.
Why am I sharing this with you?
Because I lacked confidence, I started stammering. I know this now and I didn’t realise it then.
So, if you are one of those who lack confidence in doing things know that you are not alone. There could be thousands who would have faced this difficulty in their lives.
Is this a big thing to talk about?
Yes, it is for it is all about your confidence. And without confidence, you can’t take risks and move ahead in your life.
Now, we all know that confidence is a key ingredient to success. It’s what distinguishes the achievers from the dreamers. Some people seem to be born with an innate sense of confidence. Others must work hard to grow confidence in themselves.
Here, I’m trying to share some of the tips with my personal experience and my little knowledge. I will share some practical tips, which can help you build your confidence so that you act upon your goals.
1. You know enough
Have you ever heard the saying “Fake it till you make it?” It’s a saying that boosts people to act with confidence even if they don’t feel confident. It might sound silly and there’s some deep truth to it.
When you tell yourself you know enough, your mind believes you have enough knowledge to act now. It means you don’t have to keep waiting to accumulate any more knowledge. A lot of people want to know everything.
No one knows everything!
You will keep waiting forever if you want to become the best at something before you act. Learning things by doing is the smart way.
To begin, you need to know a little and not everything. When you realise this fact, you allow yourself to try a lot of things with a bold move.
So, the next time you’re feeling unsure of yourself, tell yourself that you already know enough to do things. It’s not about having an ego. It’s not about thinking you know everything.
You are ready to act with what you know now.
It is a self-acknowledgement.
2. Ask yourself why
List out things you are not confident about and ask yourself why.
Finding out the reason why you’re not confident about something is the foundation. The reason you discover can help you overcome the barrier and make you confident.
Ask yourself why you don’t feel confident.
Do you think you are not good at something?
Do you think you don’t have enough expertise?
Are you afraid of failure?
Are you worried about social criticism?
Is it your self-doubt?
Once you have identified the reasons behind your lack of confidence, take time to reflect upon it. Later, you will become apparent and internally stimulated to act upon things.
Your action starts with a simple acknowledgement that you know enough.
You can now start making progress.
3. Take the first step
You might think it is easy to say anything and hard to act. Acting is the biggest challenge and you need confidence to do so.
The secret to understanding is that you will get confidence when you act.
Acting means starting to do something.
It is the first step that you take that is going to give you loads of confidence. Once you make the first move, all those self-created significant challenges would vanish.
You then become an all-new person with an all-new mindset. So, take that first step and see what happens.
That is how you gain confidence in your abilities. A million people can tell you to do it. But remember that no one else can do it for you except you.
Many of us may struggle to take that first step because all the excuses to not do something come to our minds. This is a common escape route and a perfect failure spot.
Take your time, introspect, and understand why you can’t take that first step.
I understand the first step can be challenging. It can seem impossible to many of us. Everyone goes through it at some point in their life. Make up your mind and decide when you want to do it. You can do it when you are ready. remember that now is always the best
time.
Take that first step, even if it’s a small one. Be okay with failure and get that immense experience from it.
One failure means one step closer to building your confidence.
4. Treat yourself
You must feel motivated to keep things going. And one nice way to feel this motivation is to celebrate your achievements. This also works great to build your confidence.
Whether it is big or small, you have achieved something, and you can celebrate it the way you want. Why not reward yourself for acting towards your goals?
Treat yourself to your favourite food or buy something from your Wishlist. It's a great way to acknowledge your progress. Treating yourself gives you more energy to take the next step.
So go ahead, give yourself a well-deserved treat!
It is not about bragging.
It is about feeling good about your progress towards your bigger dream.
Final thoughts to build your confidence
So, building confidence can happen if you act now. It can take time if you keep thinking about doing something and not doing it. It is a quick mindset shift you must have for you to become confident in no time.
Becoming confident involves realising your abilities and acting towards your target.
Tell yourself you know enough.
List things you lack confidence in and ask yourself why.
Take that first step.
Celebrate your achievements.
You already have the knowledge and skills needed to act.
Allow yourself to try.
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